I spent most of the day in the library today. Editing some more shots and applying for some web work. It seems like I didn’t get much done for the time I spent in there but oh well. I was a rainy day off and on here in Prescott so I didn’t miss too much.
I’m in the Walmart parking lot again. This time I’m somehow picking up wi-fi from the nearby Subway.
I’m not sure why or what triggered it but as I was leaving the library tonight I started to feel a little homesick. Missing my friends and certain aspects/routines of the life I left behind. The idea that even when this trip is over (whether that day is tomorrow or in a couple of years), I’m essentially still starting completely over came up and slapped me in the face today. One side of that is that it makes me want to keep going as I have nothing to lose. The other side is the fact that I have “nothing” to lose. Does that make sense? I guess it’s an internal conflict that I have to work at suppressing. I want this, it’s just hard convincing myself of it some days.
On that note I find comfort in the fact that I can slip into my sleeping bag and be warm on this rainy night. I’m thankful for that and also the fact that tomorrow I’ll be feeling back to normal about things.
“Some days you’re the bug. Some days you’re the windshield.” – Price Cobb, American race-car driver, after winning a 1988 race