Last night I walked up the stairs to the managers suite in my building and quietly slipped a piece of paper under his door. My written 30 day notice that on July 31st I’ll be vacating the apartment I’ve called home since July 2006.
Today I woke up late. I’ve been doing some running work for various concerts when I can pick it up. Today is the second show of “Star Wars in Concert” here in Vancouver. As I was heading out the door I started thinking that I was crazy. One part of me is completely excited about the prospects, opportunities and freedom my upcoming trip may bring. The other part of me…well, it’s stressed right out. Some days I feel like an overheating walking nuclear reactor.
I have a list almost as long as my arm of things that need to be done before I leave. I have another list of people that owe me money that is almost equal in length. I have some web work that I need to get done and people who are dropping the ball, therefore stressing me out even more.
I’m trying to talk myself out of all the so called “valid” fears that I have and am trying (really hard) to just surrender and trust that this is all meant to be and will all work. The very thing that I believe most of the time is hard to find today. I guess simply because one of the biggest steps has just been taken. The notice that soon, I will not have an address.
Now begins the process of seeing what I can get for the belongings that I no longer have a use for. A complete drum kit from a whole other life, a large LCD TV that I bought only a few years ago. A bachelor apartment stuffed full of junk that needs new homes. This part, I’m actually looking forward to and as a friend pointed out yesterday, will make it very easy to settle down somewhere when I finally figure out where that next long term stop might be.
Even as I write this I’m starting to feel better about my most recent step. Perhaps this blog is also becoming my therapy. Wow, how lucky I am to have the whole world as my own personal shrink.